This article sheds light on some tested tips that will help you to input the right seed in your courtship toward a blissful marriage.
“While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest shall not cease.” (Genesis 8:22).
There are laws and principles that govern life. One of such laws is the law of sowing and reaping. For every harvest, there is a seed to sow.
People who are enjoying and harvesting good fruits in their marriage are people who had sown the right seeds during courtship. To enjoy your marriage and be happy, you must be willing to sow the right seeds. Nothing good happens by chance. It must be consciously, deliberately and adequately prepared for. Courtship is a time to consciously sow the right seeds if you must enjoy your marriage.
Right seeds to sow include:
Courtship time is a time to pray. Pray for your marriage, your children and your family. It is a time to team up with your fiancée and prophesy positive things into your future (finance, health, happiness and all good things). Doing this helps you to continue even in marriage. Learn to pray together now. Couples that pray together stay together and last forever.
2. Word of God
No marriage succeeds without the word of God. The word of God is the manual that contains the principles and instructions needed to succeed in marriage. Courtship time is also a time to consciously sow the seed of the word of God through constant study of the word with your fiancée. Setting a time for Bible study in your courtship helps you to grow spiritually and affords you the opportunity to share some of the things God has revealed to you through His word in your personal quiet time and fellowship with God. This also helps your faith to grow together as the Holy Spirit reveals the true meaning of God’s word to you. Doing this in courtship makes it easy for you to continue in marriage.
To be faithful in marriage, you must start sowing the seed in your courtship. If you’re still involved in double-dealing (like trying to work out a relationship with two or more people at the same time) and think you’re having a good time, then you are destroying your marriage inadvertently. Don’t think you can change in marriage. Wedding day is not a magic day. It’s what you do during courtship that translates into marriage. No matter what happens, you must decide to stay truthful and faithful to your fiancée. Many ladies will want to date you even after knowing you are engaged but you must know how to say NO. This will help you to keep your marriage vow when you get married.
Another seed you must sow in your courtship is forgiveness. Marriage is for two ‘forgivers’. Offences will surely come but you must learn to forgive. There are times your fiancée may upset you and do things you hate the most but you must be able to forgive. Forgiveness is the best form of Love. I’ve made the decision to forgive no matter what.
5. Self Control
Courtship time is also a time to master your emotions. Self-control is very important in life and it is one of the attributes of maturity. If you can’t control your feelings and emotions (e.g. anger and hunger) now, it will affect you in marriage. As a man, learn to control your anger (if you still slap, beat and abuse your fiancée in courtship, you will do worse in marriage). A real man protects his woman. Courtship time is also a time to control your hunger for sex. If you can’t control yourself now, you won’t in marriage. If you keep sleeping around in courtship, you are sowing the seeds of adultery in your marriage. Say No to every form of sexual sin and be sexually pure.
One of the instructions and commandments in the Bible on marriage is love (Ephesians 5:22-33). Husbands are commanded to love their wives as Christ loves the church.
Courtship is a period to start showing love for your lady. Shower her lots of love and affection. Try to learn and understand her love language and start speaking the language. Doing this in courtship makes it easy for you to continue in marriage. Don’t let the wrong belief that a man shouldn’t love a woman too much make you disobey the word of God. Your relationship and marriage will definitely blossom if you learn to love your woman genuinely.
Finally, don’t be deceived; no one makes a fool of God. Whatever you plant is what you will harvest (Galatians 6:7).
Start sowing the right seeds today!
Tunde Awoyele is a Love and Relationship Coach, a tireless advocate of godly relationships and sexual purity, a writer and a conference speaker. He hosts Relationship Conference tagged SINGLES’ TIME-OUT, a platform through which he equips young adults with the knowledge they need to GET IT RIGHT and DO IT RIGHT in their relationships as they prepare for marriage and family life. You can connect with him by sending a mail to [email protected]